In Praise of Banning Gas Stoves

As long as our rulers can ban ever-more products, we have little to fear.

Thank God this picture will not exist in the future.

Last week I wrote an article on how fear rules the world. Today, I read that the rulers of New York also fear gas stoves, which they are going to ban in a couple of years.

This got me thinking about the ways fear often manifests itself in “policy.” More specifically, how our government responds to fear by banning more and more products.

I don’t think our Mensa rulers really fear gas stoves - but they (allegedly) fear Climate Change, which is going to kill us all if we don’t push a few more buttons on the ozone layer’s thermostat and change Climate Change.

As some subscribers know by now, I occasionally like to make lists. Here’s my partial list of things that have already been banned or are slated to be banned in the future.

Old-fashioned light bulbs. The light bulb worked great for 100 years, but all the light bulbs I was perfectly fine with have essentially now been banned. We’re left with the more expensive ones that are supposed to last longer and prevent hurricanes, but they don’t last as long as advertised … and many of the ones I now have to buy don’t put out enough light to read a large-print library book.

Gasoline without ethanol. It’s probably been 20 years since our rulers dictated that gasoline had to include 10-percent ethanol. I still don’t know why this had to be done, although I guess the corn lobby supported it. Anyway, that’s one reason gasoline and corn are more expensive than they should be. 

The Little Sip is still allowed.

The Big Gulp. Former NY City Mayor Michael Bloomberg banned this popular large soda. If they can ban a 16-ounce serving of Coca Cola, I guess they can ban a 12-ounce cup too. (Fortunately, Little Sips are still allowed).  Note: A subscriber informs me this ban was later over-turned by, of all things, a panel of smart judges.

Gasoline powered vehicles. California is well on the road to banning gas cars and diesel trucks and, as every big trend starts in California, I’m sure this will spread to all 50 states. 

I recently wrote a piece describing how EPA underground tank regulations ultimately killed the country store. The new regs will also kill society’s great villain, the gasoline distributor.

True speech. Dissidents keep writing essays warning about the “death of free speech,” but this isn’t entirely accurate. People are still perfectly free to say and write what they want …. as long as their words square with the authorized narrative promoted by the people who are banning gas stoves. 

What has really been banned (or heavily censored upon penalty of losing your Facebook posting privileges) is speech that tells the truth. This type speech has also been banned in all newsrooms of corporate-owned “journalism” organizations.

“Someone” also banned organizations like WikiLeaks, TV shows like “Tucker Carlson Tonight,” muck-raking like James O’Keefe did at Project Veritas and whistle-blowing pursued by the likes of Ed Snowden, Chelsey Manning and many other “traitors” or “threats to America’s national security.”

Bring the kids to pull for the Tigers …. just don’t bring your cash.

Cash payments. I recently attended the Auburn-Troy baseball game. My first surprise was that I couldn’t buy a ticket without an Apple cell phone via some app I didn’t have. My next surprise was that I couldn’t buy a hot dog and Coke with the $20 bill I had in my pocket. Cash is banned at Plainsman Park. Apparently, thousands of businesses and venues no longer accept cash.

I still don’t understand the great fear of the $20 bill. (I’m kidding; of course I do). 

The rulers in Auburn’s athletic department must fear the drug cartels operating in the Loveliest Village on the Plains. Once these crime lords get ahold of my cash, they can launder it through some car wash they also probably own and, before you know it, they have avoided paying taxes on their products.

Aside: If you’ve watched “Breaking Bad,” you remember how Walter White eventually had to rent a storage facility to keep his $20 million in cash (he also bought a car wash). If this series was set in 2030 instead of 2010, Mr. White couldn’t have done this. According to the coming narrative, when our benevolent rulers have entirely banned cash, drug dealers will be no more.

Or, I don’t know, maybe the government will legalize illicit products … and then tax them? Which leads me to …

Untaxed cigarettes (and now marijuana). We all know cigarettes are bad for us, but for some reason, government has yet to ban this product.

In many big cities, some brands of cigarettes now sell for more than $12/pack. These 20 cigarettes probably cost only $1.25 to produce and distribute to stores, which tells us government, at all levels, is making a killing … from people who may be slowly killing themselves.  Anyway, regarding our banning craze, certain caveats apply.

Driving. Just like I was slow picking up how pressing the trans-gender issue was, I was also slow to pick up on the “15-minute city” fad.

I recently watched an underground video of Dr. Michael Yeadon, one of the infamous Covid skeptics. In this interview, Yeadon disclosed that he now lives in one of these “smart cities” in his native UK. 

As he tells it, cameras are now everywhere and these cameras can read a chip on his car’s license plate. Because of this, his rulers know how many times he’s driven from his village into the bigger town next door. Basically, our progressive leaders might soon ban … driving a car. 

Once Dr. Yeadon surpasses his allotted 100 trips, something bad is going to happen to him. Dr. Yeadon’s either going to have to start riding a bicycle or his rulers will confiscate some of “his” digital money to teach him a lesson. 

Per his comments, this innovation to save the planet pisses off and scares Dr. Yeadon as much as the Covid vaccines do.

Good toilets. I normally don’t reference urination in my columns, but my above choice of words reminded me that these same people have also banned toilets, at least those that will actually flush every time.

So before they targeted the kitchen, our protectors went for the bathroom. 

As referenced, if Yeadon has a “home office,” Big Brother has already started the glide path that would ban him from using his home computer … if he types certain words in a certain order … For example, words in this order: “Vaccines are dangerous.”

In an “interview,” RFK, Jr. has already learned that ABC News (Disney) has banned him from using words to this effect.

Covid bans are a category onto themselves …

I’d never finish this column if I started listing “Covid bans.” But, for the record, here’s a few examples of activities our rulers banned for us:

Travel. Operating a Business. Worshipping at church. Visiting your loved one in a hospital or nursing home. Taking your kids to the park to play on the sliding board. Playing a sport. Acting in a play. Performing in a musical band. 

Inviting friends over for supper club or book club. Standing five feet behind the lady in the check-out line at Publix. Undergoing an “elective” surgery.

Drinking from a water fountain. Going to any public place without a mask on. Serving in the military or working for any government agency or contractor if you hadn’t gotten your vaccines.

I hope readers will use the Reader Comments section to come up with more products and activities that have been banned in the last several years … Wait … I just thought of another example …. Reader Comments at many publications.

I’ll stop here …

As you can clearly see, there’s so many things in our world that are obviously dangerous to us. As good, cowering citizens, I think we’d all agree we are blessed to have so many enlightened rulers looking out for our well-being. 

A government so fully committed to protecting us from the world’s many Boogie Men is probably the true source of our abiding patriotism. 

I don’t know who first came up with the concept of altruistic banning, but God Bless this person. Speaking for myself, I look forward to all the bannings to come.

If things get too dystopian and I decide I might need to learn to habla Espanol and move my family to Mexico or Costa Rica, I can only hope we never finish that border wall to the South (and ban “escape.”) 

If precious metals have yet to be banned, our family will take some silver and gold and ride out the storm in some hut in the jungles of South America.

Thanks to the banning of gas stoves and the internal combustion engine, tornadoes and hurricanes will be almost non-existent by then. We won’t even need light bulbs. If our rulers haven’t banned the match and candle, we’ll be able to see every terrifying storm the future throws at us.

ADDENDUM:

Thomas Buckley, a colleague of mine at the Brownstone Writer’s Group, wrote about this same subject weeks ago. His article tells us how, why and where these unnecessary bans of gas stoves started … Not surprisingly, in California.